How I got my orgasm back post baby

I know what you’re already thinking – who’s sex life doesn’t take a turn for the worse after having a baby?

I know in the early stages this is definitely true, your body has been through so much, emotions are running high, hormones are doing whatever the hell they feel like doing and you have a tiny baby hanging off your breast most of the time. Personally, I know I had the ‘closed for business’ sign around my neck for some time after the births of my little ones.

But sooner or later you do feel like revisiting that part of your life, when you have finally had more than a couple of hours sleep at night, your ‘bits’ are feeling a little more normal and sometimes when you just can’t fight your partner off any longer you are ready to give it a go.  You had a sex life before children and you can have one afterward. Sue it may be little less spontaneous but it is an important part of a your relationship and you are allowed to desire and enjoy each other again.

Pelvic floorExperience a better orgasm

You set the scene (door closed) some cuddling and kissing follows then you get down to business. You’ve done it together before so it shouldn’t be that different, right? So far, so good, he’s into it, you’re into it but no matter how hard you try that elusive orgasm, the big ‘O’ that had never been any trouble to find before has left the building! You’re frustrated, he’s got no idea what he’s doing wrong and it all just feels like a little too much effort.

This is were your pelvic floor comes into play. Your pelvic floor muscles are responsible for the amount of sensation you feel during sex. Strong muscles are said to have more nerve endings than weaker muscles and therefore meaning more sensations for you.  More importantly in order to achieve orgasm your pelvic floor needs to contract around your clitoris to stimulate and there for reach that ‘O’ so wonderful place you are looking for.

Read more → Can a pelvic floor workout make you orgasm?

The pelvic floor is stretched and often traumatised during childbirth. I find some mums that train with Body Beyond Baby often don’t realise they have a weak pelvic floor until I have suggested that they undergo a Real Time Ultrasound assessment ‘just to make sure everything is okay’ before we move into higher impact and more strenuous exercise. Results often indicate that their pelvic floor might be a lot weaker than they thought and are compensating for this weakness by using other more superficial muscles. Eventually this could lead to other complications, aches and pains (not to mention an even weaker pelvic floor) down the track.  Having delved a little deeper we discover that some of these women have not achieved orgasm since having their baby, but they haven’t made the connection between a weak pelvic floor and lack of fun in the bedroom due to the fact that they have no ‘obvious’ symptoms of a weakened pelvic floor.

So, ladies – don’t sit in silence, go and get a quick pelvic floor check up and reclaim your sex life!

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Jen Dugard
Diversely qualified master personal trainer, writer/author and mother of two, Jen Dugard, specialises in helping mothers (new and not-so-new) find their body confidence and balance again after pregnancy, and runs the largest ‘specific to mums’ group exercise class network in Sydney, Australia. Via this multi award-winning business, along with her book “How To Love Your Body As Much As Your Baby” and postnatal exercise DVD “Rebuild From The Inside Out”, along with multiple presentations and workshops, fitness magazine cover model Jen is leading the way in training mums and provides profound insights that are changing the ways that hundreds of women view their lives as mothers. (Taking care of yourself makes you a better mum and role model). She is also an international elite obstacle racer. Jen’s message on exercise as a mum is simple: “you must take the time to re-build from the inside out to become stronger, fitter and more confident that you have ever been”.